• Delphia@lemmy.world
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    51 minutes ago

    “Man my girlfriend wont let me go anywhere by myself, I cant just sit and scroll on my phone and eat my breakfast without her sitting there talking at me this is fucked”

    "I’ve got an idea.:

  • Etterra@discuss.online
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    23 minutes ago

    I have a saying; never piss off the person who cooks your food, cuts your hair, or fixes your teeth.

    That cook has just so many options for wrecking or killing that guy that it’s not even funny. One of these days he’s gonna go back there and come out on a stretcher, or worse, a body bag. And then we’ll all find out if this happened in Florida.

  • modifier@lemmy.ca
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    8 hours ago

    I get so jealous of people like that cook, who have found a sense of purpose.

    • NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world
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      7 hours ago

      Same, it’s most likely fake, but the thought of the cook coming out from behind the counter to fight the waffle house guy is hilarious. Instead of calling the cops, they fist fight like gentlemen.

      • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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        7 hours ago

        Instead of calling the cops, they fist fight like gentlemen.

        In two states, Washington and Texas, this would be technically legal. They are the only two that allow “mutual combat”. A police officer is legally required to act as a ref though.

        Texas has similar law but implicit consent (ie “fighting words”) are sufficient, unlike Washington’s explicit requirement.

        • hime0321@lemmy.world
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          5 hours ago

          Washington state has no mutual combat law. The only law I can find regarding it is from the Washington code of military justice for dueling. Even then it only says that you must report if you know about a duel or you will “be punished as a court martial may direct.” The only thing I have heard of that relates is that someone could refuse prosecution after a fight and therefore no crime occurred. There is a Seattle municipal code that only forbids fighting if there is risk to others, property, or has a substantial risk to do so.

          • TechLich@lemmy.world
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            4 hours ago

            That’s a shame, I love the mental image of somebody in Washington calling the cops like: “Hello, we’d like to get into a fight please!” and the police responding: “No worries, we’ll send someone out to referee!”

      • Captain Howdy@lemm.ee
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        9 hours ago

        the best part is the cook is learning new skills each week by trying new ways to cook eggs. the boyfriend is probably getting in his exercise.

        they are bettering each other through the feud. I love it.

          • BossDj@lemm.ee
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            7 hours ago

            I picture the cook in the back hearing “Who cooked this shit eggs? Your chef is trash!” and he smirks recognizing the voice as he removes his apron.

            • Cenzorrll@lemmy.world
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              7 hours ago

              I picture the cook in the back…

              At wafflehouse you get a front row seat of the cooks ass-crack while they cook your eggs and soggy hash browns. There is no “back” except the one you’re looking at, which, in my mind makes this so much better, because said BF would get to watch his eggs being cooked wrong while staring at his enemies ass-crack.

              If this was true, at least. Although I can absolutely see a wafflehouse cook handling customers like this as a proper gentleman should.

      • P00ptart@lemmy.world
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        5 hours ago

        I like to think the cook is watching through the window rubbing his hands together before a quick stretch.

      • Lycist@lemmy.world
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        8 hours ago

        supposedly part of the waffle house cook interview process is asking “Can you fight?”

        I dunno how valid that is, but i’ve heard waffle house cooks get into fights all the time.

        • Cenzorrll@lemmy.world
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          7 hours ago

          Everytime I’ve been in a waffle house (like 3 times) everyone who works there is scrawny as shit, except the cook. He (yes, he) is an absolute beast that looks like it’s easier for him to move the bar out of the way than go around it, or drag a troublesome customer over it by their nose and deal with the problem there instead of having to deal with the inconvenience of “taking it outside”

  • peto (he/him)@lemm.ee
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    9 hours ago

    This is what guys do instead of friendship. You can bet if cook isn’t there one week BF is going to go do a wellness check.

  • parody
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    8 hours ago

    Ladies, if your man slurpin that raw albumin, remember there are plenty of fish in the sea and not all of them are hard for salmonella