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irelephant [he/him]🍭@lemm.ee to Asklemmy@lemmy.ml · 4 个月前

Go to wikihow and press on "random article". That is what you die doing. How do you die?

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Go to wikihow and press on "random article". That is what you die doing. How do you die?

irelephant [he/him]🍭@lemm.ee to Asklemmy@lemmy.ml · 4 个月前
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https://www.wikihow.com/Main-Page Direct link to the random button: https://wikihow.com/Special:Randomizer

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  • stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de
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    4 个月前

    I’m dying in a religious conflict

    • stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de
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      4 个月前

      Bonus:

    • I_am_10_squirrels@beehaw.org
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      4 个月前

      Are you by chance Irish?

  • 𒉀TheGuyTM3𒉁@lemmy.ml
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    4 个月前

    https://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Middle-School-Crush-to-Like-You

    UUUHHHHH


    monday


    inhales

    I like coming here.

    In break times, i often get to see her, with her long skirt, her adorable jacket, and her soft, long, brown hair.

    She is rather tall in her friend group, she must be 13, maybe 14…

    It doesn’t stop me for loving her even if i am in my 40’s.

    Nothing can.

    It’s not a barbaric attraction like thoses weird pedophiles.

    My love is pure.

    She’s made to be mine.

    “I want to be with her together.”


    tuesday


    She just leaved the school to buy her meal.

    Today she did attach her hairs into two braids, with ribbons at the ends.

    She is so cute.

    “I absoluetly want to be with her”


    She seems to be alone right now.

    “Is it my chance?”

    Slowly, gently, silently, I put some chloroform on the piece of cotton.

    Softly, purely, nicely, I approach her from behind.

    Strangely, surprisingly, quickly, she does a barrel roll and a backflip, and face me with an assault rifle.

    Rougly, straightly, immediatly, she say: “ladies and gentleman, we got him”

    Painly, horribly, trementously, i get perfored multiple times by supersonic projectiles, and fall on the ground.

    “aww man”

    I just died trying to get a middle school crush to like me.


    Guys don’t call the police it’s for the thing

    • Refurbished Refurbisher@lemmy.sdf.org
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      4 个月前

      FBI OPEN UP

  • flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    4 个月前

    Initiative in D&D 5E

    I die in a conflict where I tell a Wizards of the Coast zombie that Paizo and Pathfinder are the best, which, honestly, I should’ve seen coming.

    • Take_your_zync@eviltoast.org
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      4 个月前

      I will also die on the hill of pf >>> 5e.

  • otacon239@lemmy.world
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    4 个月前

    I think this speaks for itself

  • Aradina [They/Them]@lemmy.ml
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    4 个月前

    Apparently I’ll die becoming Israeli

    • ahal@lemmy.ca
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      4 个月前

      At least you aren’t going to die becoming a southern belle.

  • Zelaf@sopuli.xyz
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    4 个月前

    I’m dying of stupidity, apparently.

    • Zavasay@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 个月前

      Dying is the opposite of seeking mental stimulation lol

  • Nollij@sopuli.xyz
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    4 个月前

    I have nothing more to add to this.

    https://www.wikihow.com/Get-Rid-of-Carpenter-Bees-Using-Wd40

  • sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works
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    4 个月前

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
      cake
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      4 个月前

      I WARNED YEH!
      DIDN’T I WARN YEH?

  • ProjectMork@lemmy.ml
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    4 个月前

    well hmm, This could be interesting

  • .Donuts@lemmy.world
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    4 个月前

    Welp…

    • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world
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      4 个月前

      Getting punched in the throat while trying to wall thump somebody is peak physical comedy.

      • .Donuts@lemmy.world
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        4 个月前

        Praying for death by snu snu…

  • Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world
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    4 个月前

    How To Get More Views on a Facebook Video

    God dammit

    • irelephant [he/him]🍭@lemm.eeOP
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      4 个月前

      Step one: Post when zuck was skewing video counts to make people “pivot to video”

  • BreadOven@lemmy.world
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    4 个月前

    Is that link rigged…? This is what I got:

    https://www.wikihow.com/Give-a-Rectal-Exam

    • wintermute@discuss.tchncs.de
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      4 个月前

      I got “How to remove a urinary catheter” 😱🤣

      • BreadOven@lemmy.world
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        3 个月前

        😳

    • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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      4 个月前

      You must be a crewman on the Sargossa

  • communism@lemmy.ml
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    4 个月前

    https://www.wikihow.com/Write-Your-Own-Eulogy

    Well, at least I was prepared.

    • Melbourne@lemmy.ca
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      4 个月前

      That’s so damn funny!!!

  • Che Banana@beehaw.org
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    4 个月前

    https://www.wikihow.com/Build-a-Snow-Cave

    apparently I’m bad at igloos

  • Nate@programming.dev
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    4 个月前

    How to treat a hernia at home (and when you see a doctor)

    :(

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