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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 10 个月前

Bilblow Baggins?

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Bilblow Baggins?

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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 10 个月前
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  • Brave Little Hitachi Wand@lemmy.world
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    10 个月前

    I gotta say fellas, that is the most erotic thing I’ve read this decade, and the wife got me into romfic last year.

    • BaroqueInMind@lemmy.one
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      10 个月前

      Yeah I wish this story was true and happened to me as well lmao

      • pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        10 个月前

        👀

    • Klnsfw 🏳️‍🌈@lemmynsfw.com
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      10 个月前

      In my opinion, it would be even better if the roles were reversed, and the guy was giving oral sex.

      • tfw_no_toiletpaper@lemmy.world
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        10 个月前

        Why do you assume it was a woman giving head

        • Klnsfw 🏳️‍🌈@lemmynsfw.com
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          10 个月前

          I didn’t. That’s why I used the neutral term “oral sex” instead of blowjob or pussy licking

          • TriPolarBearz@lemmy.world
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            10 个月前

            What a cunnilingus cunning linguist!

  • Mayor Poopington@lemmy.world
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    deleted by creator

    • halcyoncmdr@lemmy.world
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      10 个月前

      You know… I never even considered that this was being told from a woman’s perspective, I 100% just assumed it was a dude, there was no doubt in my mind.

      • ikidd@lemmy.world
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        10 个月前

        I saw meme Netflix girl with the crazy eyes and gun when I was reading it.

      • Walk_blesseD@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        10 个月前

        Given the pink triangle in their profile pic, I’m gonna assume OOP is a gay man.

    • Poplar?@lemmy.world
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      10 个月前

      Or he :P

  • loopedcandle@lemmynsfw.com
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    10 个月前

    I always thought my kink was too specific, but look, there it is for all to see.

  • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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    10 个月前

    I would gladly be on either side of this, tbh. I did once get a bit of a blowjob during doctor who, but I made him stop because I couldn’t focus on the episode (heaven sent). We canoodled after, but he was clearly upset I valued a show over sex. But, like, it was heaven sent! And it was the premier of the episode. I made the right choice.

    • pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      10 个月前

      Lmao mood, like if you’re going to put something on for background noise it better be something neither of us care about. Being on the giving end sounds amazing, marathon dick sucking to go with marathon lotr watching, amazing.

      • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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        10 个月前

        Yeah, I could totally be on the giving end, and wouldn’t mind being on the receiving end, if the blower were also into what was on, and it was like a major edging session like in the image.

        Or, y’know, if we did it doggy style and both watched xfiles

        • pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          10 个月前

          …are you doing anything next weekend?

          • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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            10 个月前

            Nope, send me an address and cue uo Mulder and Scully!

        • AtariDump@lemmy.world
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          10 个月前

          You and me baby….

          • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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            10 个月前

            … Ain’t nothing but mammals…

            • AtariDump@lemmy.world
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              10 个月前

              …so let’s do it like they do it…

              • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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                10 个月前

                On the discovery channel!

    • wetsoggybread@lemmy.world
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      10 个月前

      Heaven sent is my favorite episode with Capaldi, just the idea and plot of the episode is well written and the acting is wonderful too

      • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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        10 个月前

        It’s so freaking good. Way better than a blowjob lmao

        • AtariDump@lemmy.world
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          10 个月前

          Depends on the BJ.

          • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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            10 个月前

            I’ve had some mind blowingly good blowjob, but for me, heaven sent will always be better. Though sometimes the buildup/horniness will mean I’ll take the less good blowjob over the superior Whosperience

    • NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone
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      10 个月前

      Pretty sure practically the same thing happened in Queer As Folk before RTD went on to reboot Doctor Who.

      • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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        10 个月前

        Really? Haha. I need to get around to watching queer as folk at some point

  • ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org
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    10 个月前

    reeling

    1. Being too awestruck or shocked to comprehend anything
    2. to be laughing uncontrollably to the point you don’t know what bodily fluids will excrete from your orifices

    (Urban Dictionary)

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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      10 个月前

      It has the same definition in a real dictionary, too.

      • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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        10 个月前

        Urban dictionary is a real dictionary.

        • Zulu@lemmy.world
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          10 个月前

          Missed opportunity to say “reel” dictionary.

  • -☆-@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    10 个月前

    God that’s hot af

  • janNatan@lemmy.ml
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    10 个月前

    This is why the ideal background movie is any Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie. They are hilarious, but ultimately the movies behind them tend to be boring. You don’t usually need to pay attention to the plot to get most of the jokes. So, your attention can weave in and out. They are also usually monotone enough to fall asleep to, which is a bonus.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      10 个月前

      I lost my virginity during a Turkey Day marathon. 100% serious.

  • Bunnylux@lemmy.world
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    10 个月前

    Extremely relatable. I tried to watch LOTR with my boyfriend who never saw it/cared about it. He was like eating snacks and not hearing all the dialogue. I had to turn it off after 10 minutes and crying twice already. I couldn’t do it. I cared too much.

    • threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works
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      10 个月前

      So this means you’re single now? He’s obviously not worthy. ;)

      • Bunnylux@lemmy.world
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        10 个月前

        Nah, he gets a pass. He’s a little too old for it to have been a formative experience like it was for me.

    • BeardedGingerWonder@feddit.uk
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      10 个月前

      Don’t sweat it, it’s just a bunch of pixies running around for 9 hours.

      • stinky@redlemmy.com
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        10 个月前

        They literally could have flown to modor on eagles

        • Chekhovs_Gun@lemmy.world
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          10 个月前

          That was the plan and that’s where they were going just before Gandalf fell to his (presumed) death with that Balrog. They were on their way to the land of the eagles. And it’s why, just before Gandalf fell, he said “fly you fools”.

          Read that somewhere on here or reddit.

          • stinky@redlemmy.com
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            10 个月前

            “Get in the car Steve”

            hospitalized for jaw injury ice skating

            idiots fucking walk rather than driving

        • Ross_audio@lemmy.world
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          10 个月前

          How about they Walk Walk Walk Walk Walk Walk Walk Walk

          • Slovene@feddit.nl
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            10 个月前

            Even the fucking trees walked in those movies. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8d_oSWH4pMQ

  • ElfBean@fedia.io
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    10 个月前

    God I wish that were me. Either of them, I don’t care

  • Saryn@lemmy.world
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    10 个月前

    Lucky bastard

  • Rooty@lemmy.world
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    10 个月前

    I’m guessing the edging was again at maximum during the Aragorn helmet kicking scene.

    • Valthorn@feddit.nu
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      10 个月前

      He reacted the same way Aragorn did.

      • MrVilliam@lemm.ee
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        10 个月前

        You know, he broke his toe during that scene. That’s why the scream was so soulful. If you didn’t know any better, you’d just assume the look on his face and the passionate shouting were just from the blowjob.

    • photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      10 个月前

      That’s Two Towers. Let’s hope he gets another date.

      • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.worldBanned from community
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        10 个月前

        Oh, this one’s a keeper.

  • Denjin
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    10 个月前

    I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me

  • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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    10 个月前

    Oh come on, “my precious” was RIGHT there…

  • zipzoopaboop@lemmynsfw.com
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    10 个月前

    Mistake?

  • BlueFootedPetey@sh.itjust.works
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    10 个月前

    She was explaining bombadil, cause he’s not in the movies, right?

    Never got through the books and don’t recall him in the movies. He’s magic card is super neat if very narrow, anyone wanna give me a quick Who or what he is?

    • kayden@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      10 个月前

      Sure, pull your pants down.

    • MrPoopbutt@lemmy.world
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      10 个月前

      Tom Bombadil is a Tolkien self insert who is immune to the effects of the ring and has a really hott wife iirc

      • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lol
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        10 个月前

        Huh haven’t heard of the self insert thing. Thought bombadil was one of the valor in stealth mode?

        • Madison420@lemmy.worldBanned from community
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          10 个月前

          Maybe, there’s also an argument to be made for Tom being an earthly embodiment of eru the creator given the whole knowing the world when it was young and seeing the first rain and first acorn bit.

          • lud@lemm.ee
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            deleted by creator

            • Madison420@lemmy.worldBanned from community
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              10 个月前

              Sorta. We know he’s amoung the oldest beings in universe given the acorn line being able to be interpreted as seeing the first acorn or to be the first to see an acorn so first valar or eru.

              I like to think he’s the conscious embodiment entropy of middle earth.

              • Wugmeister@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                10 个月前

                I mean, its entirely possible that he was created as some unforseen confluence of melodies in the Song of the Ainur. Sort of like how the popular theory for the origin of Ungoliant is that she arose from the discord between Melkor’s song and Eru’s song

                • Madison420@lemmy.worldBanned from community
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                  10 个月前

                  Certainly, I just like that everything with a purpose seems drawn to him and he then directs them to where they’re supposed to be but they all leave questioning each other or themselves as to what the fuck just happened.

    • untorquer@lemmy.world
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      10 个月前

      Not a TLDR but…

      Audiobook in case you are better with that. Other two books are there somewhere. There’s also a whole thing about getting a sick dagger which never shows in the movies. Also a whole thing in the conclusion of the series about Hobbiton which is fun. The movies did a good job selecting plots to omit.

      https://archive.org/details/TheFellowshipOfTherRingAudiobook

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