Xmas, new year, valentine’s… Seems like the festivities are there just to remind me how much I failed as an adult man incapable of getting company. It’s been over a decade since I’ve felt this way and nothing changes.

Alcohol and porn has lost its charm over the years.

  • @JubilantJaguar@lemmy.world
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    112 days ago

    It really is a conundrum. Group festivities seem almost designed to make the people on the margins of society feel worse about themselves. And yet try to imagine a society without such events. It would be even worse (and of course no such society has never existed). This whole problem is exacerbated so much by the fractured nature of modern urban life. In the past it was not even possible to be alone at Christmas, because nobody much was ever alone.

    Anyway, as something of a marginal type myself, I agree with suggestions others have made. If you try hard enough, you really can see through the myth of social “success” and “failure”. At that point, festive dates will begin to seem like what they are: just dates. As for “getting company”, this one’s pretty easy. Join some social group with regular events, and make it a fixture in your diary. You’ll meet new people and eventually things will move on from there. But be patient! All human relations are about the hours invested. So if you haven’t taken this first step already, there’s no time to lose. Make it your new year’s resolution.

    • @PlatypusOP
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      2 days ago

      The social club stuff doesn’t work when 1. You’re tired and 2. You’re broke and can’t drive. There’s nothing that interests me around, and I don’t have the energy

      • @apocalypticat@lemmy.world
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        82 days ago

        Looks like you have the energy to make posts and comment on Lemmy. Use that energy to go on a walk or something for a change. For me, once I start being active, it leads to more energy, and more activities. Social media is exhausting in a whole other way. Trust me, you’ll gain the energy after you start walking.

        • @PlatypusOP
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          12 days ago

          That’s not even remotely the same.

          • @apocalypticat@lemmy.world
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            92 days ago

            Okay, I’ll try a different approach rather than giving advice. Your situation sounds awful, and it must be really hard for you. Reach out if you need, we’re there for you in spirit.

          • @can@sh.itjust.works
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            22 days ago

            I wish I could articulate anything more than to say things can (and will) change and the future will be different.