Please note we’re a women’s only community, please only comment if you identify as female or non binary

  • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
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    2 days ago

    Enby here, can confirm. My parents stopped letting me hang out with the girl across the street when I was 5 because an interest in playing with her dolls was “too feminine” for a “boy” like me.

    My stepsisters got to be cheerleaders, I got forced to change high schools between my sophomore and junior years because my friend circle was mostly queer.

    • Madzielle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      19 hours ago

      Hey there! You weren’t allowed to cheerlead, I was forced to when I wanted to play football, but I wasnt allowed to play football.

      I also wasn’t allowed to ride quads or dirtbikes, or cut my hair or skateboard.

      It sucked because my girl cousins got to, one of my cousins was the only female football player in our town. My stepfather wouldn’t let me do any of it though.

      He taught me how to “be a good wife” however… Ugh. I feel you. I let my son be interested in whatever he chooses today. It’s not hard to do.

      • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
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        18 hours ago

        To be entirely fair, I didn’t want to be a cheerleader either. My extracirriculars before I was moved to a new school were mostly the chess and anime clubs, and afterwards I had to take the bus and couldn’t stay for after-school activities anymore.

        My parents did let me grow my hair out and get my ears pierced, but that’s as far as I was willing to risk a femme presentation while I was living under their roof.

        • Madzielle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          18 hours ago

          Yeah I get that. I also wasnt allowed to pierce my ears. My step father was old old school. Had to do skirt checks and everything. My sister wore shorts one time and he called her a whore :(

          I started cutting my hair myself in highschool. My stupid ass stepfather thought it just didn’t grow lmao

          Sucks we can’t get those days back, but I hope today you are able to do as you please.

          • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
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            17 hours ago

            For the most part, yeah!

            My biggest challenge is finding clothes that fit me well, Women’s sizes are too short, Men’s sizes are too straight, and what passes for enby fashion is all baggy and sexless. XD

    • LadyButterfly@lazysoci.alOPM
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      2 days ago

      Hey Knightly! Really glad to have you in our group. I’ve recently read a load of academic articles on parental treatment of LGBTQIA kids. Tldr we’re often gender non conforming and often get treated like shit because of that. So I’m sorry to say your story is really common

      • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
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        2 days ago

        Thanks! I’ve been reading for a while but didn’t feel comfortable commenting without your invite. =D

        It really is a sadly common tale, but at least my story there has a happy ending. I never got kicked out, and it took 25 years longer than it should have but I moved to a blue state, started hormone therapy, and was accepted when I came out to my family.

        • LadyButterfly@lazysoci.alOPM
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          2 days ago

          I do love a happy ending! So glad you made it through to your true self. What’s been the best thing about it?

          • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
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            2 days ago

            Honestly, the gender euphoria.

            I spent so long living with dysphoria that being mildly depressed was my normal, but that first dose of Estrogen wiped it all away in an hour. It was like a piece of myself that had been missing for as long as I can remember just fell into place, and I spent that whole first day just grinning like an idiot and struggling not to break into a little dance every time I walked across a room.

            Runner-up: A close tie between soft skin and my androgynous new scent.

            Worst things? Relationship troubles with a partner that isn’t into trans people, and the conflicting choice between going stealth for safety or being the visible enby I never got to see when I was growing up.

            Funniest thing? Most folks still just assuming I’m a guy because I’m keeping the fancy moustache, and then doing a double-take when they belatedly notice the padded bra that bumps me up to B-cups. XD

            • LadyButterfly@lazysoci.alOPM
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              2 days ago

              Yes absolutely your body knew! It just knew as soon as the estrogen hit it, it was the thing that was missing. Love that

              • knightly the Sneptaur@pawb.social
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                2 days ago

                For real. My only regret is that I couldn’t get started 'til I got away from Texas, and with the way the politics is going it doesn’t even feel safe to visit family there…