I mean realistically

  • @lath@lemmy.world
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    788 months ago

    Realistically, i’d go to city hall and hand in my death certificate. They’ll take it in because they’re not being paid enough to care. Then i’d be legally dead. Afterwards i’d go into the mountains and probably die because i don’t know how to live in the mountains, but it sounded nice in my mind.

  • @ExLisper@linux.community
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    288 months ago

    There’s a Spanish movie about a guy who goes into the mountains to commit suicide but in the end chickens. Instead of going back home he stays in the mountains and lives by gathering what he can find and stealing food. He takes vegetables from the fields, steals some eggs, chickens, stuff like that. He than finds abandoned house, cleans it a bit and starts growing some food. It’s based on a true story and I’m pretty sure you could still do it. There’s a lot of abandoned houses where I live, the winders are mild. I will try to find that movie, they don’t say a single word in it so it’s not an issue it’s Spanish.

    If you want better quality of life you would have to go to some developing country and do physical work for cash. Even better than that would require fake documents which gets risky, especially in foreign country.

    • @Bristlecone@lemmy.world
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      28 months ago

      Kind of similar sounding, I want saw a movie about a guy who jumps over the side of a freeway to try and commit suicide and then ends up getting trapped on a little island under the freeway. He ends up like needing to do a little farm or something down there if I’m remembering correctly. I actually really enjoyed the premise now that I’m thinking about it

      • @ExLisper@linux.community
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        48 months ago

        Yes, Korean I believe. Similar but more fantasy like. ‘El Perdido’ was based on a true story. The Korean one was called… Castaway on the Moon. Jesus, my memory is sooo good :)

      • @ExLisper@linux.community
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        78 months ago

        Southern Spain. When hiking you see a lot of empty houses, sometimes even entire settlements that used to house ~100 people. My guess is that you can also find some deeper in the mounts, father away from the trails.

        Many years ago I’ve met a guy while hiking in Poland. He was heading to some valley where he knew empty house was. He said that during summer he goes to a house like this, plants some vegetables and lives there till winter. During winter he worked to earn enough money to survive next summer. Quite different because of the weather but I mean he was able to just go to an empty house in the mountains and live there for months.

      • @Hazzia@discuss.tchncs.de
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        28 months ago

        Not OP, but the US has a surprising amount of dead/dying rural communities, even in the south. Mostly oil/coal/lumbermill towns that got shutdown, and especially prevelant in Appalachia. There’s also the possibility of OP being from a developing (or less wealthy) country.

        • @RBWells@lemmy.world
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          18 months ago

          I’d not risk it here in the US, since everyone and their grandma is packing. It’s just so hard to imagine because all our land here is getting developed.

          On the original question, I’d get a fake identity I guess. Am in the least-profiled, most trusted demographic right now so probably could manage it. But ouch I would miss my life.

  • @Staple_Diet@aussie.zone
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    208 months ago

    It’s tricky and of course context dependent. It’d be much easier if there was no apparent motive (massive debt, impending arrest, history of fraud etc). I’ve often thought a holiday to a developing country with porous borders would be your best bet. If you are in a western nation it’s quite difficult to disappear within your own borders, and it is hard to survive without an identity. Even then, most western nations will send someone/s to investigate your disappearance or pursue the matter via Interpol etc. Add to this your appearance is likely to raise attention if you are obviously not a local (in my case I am a white AF guy with tattoos who would not melt into the background in India). Further, no matter the money you have you ultimately want some type of identity and passport in case your current situation gets hot. In my scenario I would travel to country A using my legitimate credentials, then disappear (drowning is a good one, cheers Harold). I’d then leg it to the neighbouring country (country B) where I’d attempt to get a new identity using forgeries I’d already organised from another country different to my home. Once I can establish my identity in country B (residency over months/years etc) I’d then move to my final destination and keep my head down.

    There’s plenty of stories of those who try to restart and get caught (Nick Rossi, John Darwin). Common thread is they don’t completely break from their previous life, or they move somewhere too obvious. Another key point is having to deal with some real sketchy people to make all of this happen properly. You’d essentially need to be smuggled across borders and acquire forged documents.

    I’d be keen to hear others back-of-napkin plans.

    • GunpachiOP
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      58 months ago

      Now this is the kind of comment I was waiting for. Thanks a lot.

    • @Grimy@lemmy.world
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      48 months ago

      People dying in foreign countries seem to always pop up in the news. You end up with a bigger investigation imo. I think the best is kayaking accident at home. Drowning is a great choice since it makes sense a body isnt recovered.

      That being said, faking your own death is almost always the bad move. You end up having to live like a dog and probably end up getting caught eventually, might as well just do the time (I always assume it’s about dodging prison)

  • Illecors
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    198 months ago

    I remember reading ages ago that the best way to get a US citizenship was to swim ashore naked and pretend to have amnesia. I guess some iteration of this should work in most countries that are not landlocked or have big rivers.

      • Illecors
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        88 months ago

        The idea was that accents didn’t matter. It was exploiting some bureaucratic hell where there is no way out if you don’t provide your country of origin. Can’t be deported if they don’t know where to deport you to, I guess.

        I wouldn’t be sticking to US, though. Any country you can speak some language of should do.

  • @curiousaur@reddthat.com
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    8 months ago

    I have a friend who works at the morgue. He drives the hearse, picks up bodies that don’t need autopsies, prepares the bodies, hosts the funurals, a lot of it. He knows the guys who operate the crematorium and dig the graves well. He can make a body disappear. He also finds plenty of John Does, unidentified bodies. Mostly ones that float up to the shore, severely decayed. He’s told me if I needed, I’d just have to lay low for a few weeks and he’d have a body in my casket.

  • themeatbridge
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    118 months ago

    Whatever you’re trying to accomplish with your fake death, there are easier, brtter ways to do it.

    • GunpachiOP
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      48 months ago

      You are probably right. I just wanted to know how people would handle faking their death and live on with it.

  • @paddirn@lemmy.world
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    98 months ago

    Probably just try to disappear suddenly and people will just assume you died somehow. You’d have to cut-off contact with absolutely everybody. Go to a foreign country, probably third-world, where things are a bit more lax in terms of tracking people, and just start a new life there. You could try to do it in America, but it’s much harder to accomplish with licenses and social security numbers and all that required to do anything. It’s hard for a person to truly disappear innAmerica. Learning another language would be almost certainly required, though Spanish or French might get you by depending on where you went. Even English might be good enough if you went to a country with some tourism business, you might even be able to make it as a tour guide or something.

  • @grasshopper_mouse@lemmy.world
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    88 months ago

    I remember after 9/11, there were rumors that some people who were working in the towers didn’t actually die, they just took the opportunity to walk away from their lives and start over. Stuff like this helped fuel that idea: https://au.lifestyle.yahoo.com/amphtml/postsecret-9-11-note-haunts-people-on-september-11-anniversary-37055177.html

    Did people really use 9/11 as an excuse to fake their death? No idea. Maybe the whole concept was made up by surviving families in an attempt to cope with their loved one’s death.

  • edric
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    88 months ago

    Wasn’t there a guy in the news quite recently who was discovered to be the person who walked out of his family one day and just disappeared? Apparently he was living like just a city away under a different name. That seems much easier than the other convuluted suggestions mentioned in this thread. He did get found out, but that was after so many years and because he never bothered to hide. If he moved every couple of years, he probably would’ve never been discovered.

    • Call me Lenny/Leni
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      18 months ago

      That largely depends on who is looking for you or if there’s an actual assumption that you died or gone missing. Those circumstances you describe seem counterintuitive.

    • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      58 months ago

      That’s so dumb, people would just follow your ice trail up into the sky and in to the XXX bar

  • @OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml
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    8 months ago

    Realistically you’ll lose your citizenship and ID. So move to a third world country and never log into your online accounts again.

  • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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    48 months ago

    I would write a note starting with something like “aaah a levifold has got-” and then I would go live with the barmaid down the road.

  • Call me Lenny/Leni
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    18 months ago

    Not sure. Any time you fake your death, you have to keep in mind that living humans need food, and so it’s difficult to look like you stopped eating to someone who knows enough to monitor the food consumption of an area. It’s one of those “the criminal always returns to the scene of the crime” situations (that saying always struck me as odd). Food is just one thing though that could be considered an expectation you can count on for all humans in order to track someone down. Therefore, I would have to either become a nomad and escape into the wood (or maybe a cave as friends of mine would suggest) or hide in someone’s house away from law enforcement, but even then a bad set of circumstances can give me away.

  • visnudeva
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    18 months ago

    I would just disappear while traveling in the Himalayas or something similar.