• @SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social
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    74 months ago

    I’m not a conspiracy theorist, either, but my preferred suspicion is that it’s aliens. They’ve tried a number of techniques, from implanting mind-control devices (Mitch McConnell and the way his face carries a look of horrified disgust at the things they make him do) to direct infiltration by putting one of their agents in an ill-fitting human suit (Ted Cruz). Ultimately, they seem to have given up the finesse approach, and settled on lobotomizing humans with existing personality disorders to create a RAID (redundant array of inexpensive dipshits) to simply overwhelm our system of government.

    It’s the only explanation that really makes sense to me.