I feel exactly the same way as how you described it. I think the quote from OP about the universe experiencing itself actually originated from Carl Sagan, who is as scientific and atheistic as you could ask for. It’s just a play on words.

And then you have the likes of Deepak Chopra, who is the most disingenuous woowoo-talking charlatan in existence. If he said something like that, he would mean it literally.