@RobotToaster@mander.xyz to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish • 11 months agoRetired teacher’s pension stopped as provider refuses to believe she is not deadwww.theguardian.comexternal-linkmessage-square37fedilinkarrow-up1567arrow-down16cross-posted to: hackernews@lemmy.smeargle.fanshackernews@derp.foo
arrow-up1561arrow-down1external-linkRetired teacher’s pension stopped as provider refuses to believe she is not deadwww.theguardian.com@RobotToaster@mander.xyz to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish • 11 months agomessage-square37fedilinkcross-posted to: hackernews@lemmy.smeargle.fanshackernews@derp.foo
minus-squareSpicyAntlinkfedilinkEnglish82•11 months ago “In November I had received two letters from Teachers’ Pensions asking me euphemistically if I was dead,” I am curious about how one euphemistically asks someone if they are dead. Any guess?
minus-square@squirmy_wormy@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglish107•edit-211 months agoDear Mrs McGrath, Are you napping or are you taking “the big sleep”? Sincerely, The teachers pension
minus-square@RobotToaster@mander.xyzOPlinkfedilinkEnglish47•11 months agoWe are writing to enquire as to the current status of your mitochondria.
minus-square@cafeinux@infosec.publinkfedilinkEnglish31•11 months agoDid you recently (or less recently) stop breathing for more than 10 minutes, and if so, are you or not a professional freediver?
minus-squarevrojaklinkfedilink2•11 months ago“I thought you had died of old age.” “Died? No. Became stronger? Yes.”
minus-square@Hamartiogonic@sopuli.xyzlinkfedilinkEnglish1•11 months ago Is anybody there? No. Ok, that’s good. For a moment I thought there could be a could be a stabby knife murderer hiding in the closet. Nope, there’s no one here. You can guess how the story ends…
I am curious about how one euphemistically asks someone if they are dead. Any guess?
Dear Mrs McGrath,
Are you napping or are you taking “the big sleep”?
Sincerely, The teachers pension
deleted by creator
Check box, yes or no…
We are writing to enquire as to the current status of your mitochondria.
Did you recently (or less recently) stop breathing for more than 10 minutes, and if so, are you or not a professional freediver?
“Hey Sanka! You dead?”
“Naah maaan!”
Mocking Query: Coorta, Coorta, are you dead yet?
“I thought you had died of old age.”
“Died? No. Became stronger? Yes.”
Is anybody there?
No.
Ok, that’s good. For a moment I thought there could be a could be a stabby knife murderer hiding in the closet.
Nope, there’s no one here.
You can guess how the story ends…