If someone whom I respected shat a bit in email about my work product, I’d be sad for a bit. Then I’d read it again and understand it’s my work product and I am not my work. I can make mistakes and I can fix them, and fixing mistakes is how we get awesome.
I have received negative feedback. And I did feel just a little butthurt about it. But it was in NJ and I was new, and didn’t see from the first read that Buddy was expressing frank and honest concerns about my work product and not me. I’m embarrassed to say how long it took me to clue in, but I did. And we worked through my mistakes and I was the better for it. And I learned.
And when he said my work didn’t suck as much, I knew I was improving, because I could trust him.
I get what you mean, but there are ways to say you fucked up, without calling you expletives. Some days, you get angry and scream at someone, but it doesn’t really make it feel amazing for the party being screamed at.
I didn’t mean it was mean from him to give him feedback or correct him, but the way he said it was a bit overblown.
As already stated it’s less about the facts being communicated and more about the way they’re being communicated.
I would posit that the mismatch in the style of communication lead to you needing more time to clue in. And in that way, the initial feedback might have been an inefficient way to relay the point.
However it’s also entirely possible that trying to package it in a better way, the point of the feedback-giver would have gotten lost, leading you not to clue in at all.
Communication is hard, especially tailoring it to the expected audience. That being said I don’t think being an asshole is ever ok, unless it directly saves lives or something. 😅
That’s why you should never put people on a pedestal. There are a lot of people I admire, but I always try to imagine them being stupid assholes most of the time to balance things out in my head.
I’d give as good as I got and we’d be fine. Not everyone is a spineless crybaby who melts down at the first hint of disapproval. Are you all little children?
Edit: Stupid question, apparently. Good thing it was rhetorical.
Like, I get how it’s funny, but I would hate to get this kind of shit from someone I respect. Would really mess me up, personally
So publicly, too. People have quit over it.
If someone whom I respected shat a bit in email about my work product, I’d be sad for a bit. Then I’d read it again and understand it’s my work product and I am not my work. I can make mistakes and I can fix them, and fixing mistakes is how we get awesome.
I have received negative feedback. And I did feel just a little butthurt about it. But it was in NJ and I was new, and didn’t see from the first read that Buddy was expressing frank and honest concerns about my work product and not me. I’m embarrassed to say how long it took me to clue in, but I did. And we worked through my mistakes and I was the better for it. And I learned.
And when he said my work didn’t suck as much, I knew I was improving, because I could trust him.
You need to learn honest from asshole.
I get what you mean, but there are ways to say you fucked up, without calling you expletives. Some days, you get angry and scream at someone, but it doesn’t really make it feel amazing for the party being screamed at.
I didn’t mean it was mean from him to give him feedback or correct him, but the way he said it was a bit overblown.
As already stated it’s less about the facts being communicated and more about the way they’re being communicated.
I would posit that the mismatch in the style of communication lead to you needing more time to clue in. And in that way, the initial feedback might have been an inefficient way to relay the point.
However it’s also entirely possible that trying to package it in a better way, the point of the feedback-giver would have gotten lost, leading you not to clue in at all.
Communication is hard, especially tailoring it to the expected audience. That being said I don’t think being an asshole is ever ok, unless it directly saves lives or something. 😅
That’s why you should never put people on a pedestal. There are a lot of people I admire, but I always try to imagine them being stupid assholes most of the time to balance things out in my head.
It’s nice to have an idol to aspire to, but they don’t say “don’t meet your heroes” for no reason…
Not me, I’d just take a closer look at what I’ve done and see where my mistakes are.
It’s not like we’re married or something, I don’t live with him. It’s just an email, get over it.
I don’t think having tough skin should be a prerequisite in IT.
You can tell a person they made a mistake or are wrong without being a cunt about it.
When the person doesn’t see anything wrong with what they did, yes I belive I have the right to be a cunt about it.
I’d give as good as I got and we’d be fine. Not everyone is a spineless crybaby who melts down at the first hint of disapproval. Are you all little children?
Edit: Stupid question, apparently. Good thing it was rhetorical.
Wow, you are sooooooo tough, guy!!!
So strong and manly!!!
I’m sure you have so many girlfriends!!!
They might even smoke weed
NO WAY!!!
THE DEVILS LETTUCE?!!??!
That’s so toxic. You may need therapy
Guy called me spineless crybaby. It’s fair to hit back.
I hope I never meet you. You really don’t know how to human.
This is way beyond a first hint of disapproval.
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Found the Karen.