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Please remember to change your religion daily and wash it regularly.
Also, if you’re not religious, you’re not allowed to sit on my couch.
I was shopping for clothes at a indie clothing place, and they asked if I was wearing underwear when I requested the key for the changing room. I said of course, and asked why. They said they’d had a number of patrons who apparently destroyed merchandise by not wearing underwear or cleaning their ass.
Seared into my memory, lol.
Mmm very wise